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Preach, sister!

28 Jun

How often do you find yourself losing sight of who you are when you’re in a relationship?  So as my girlfriend stays with her douche bag boyfriend, and as I keep writing to you about it, I’m intrigued to see the comments that you, my friendly and faithful readers, post.

Have spent the weekend thinking a lot about this one, that misschief101 posted:

There is something though about women who sacrifice to be in relationships. More often than not, it leads to a couple staying together long term or forever. I’ve been reading your blog for years, and always miss the hell out of your lighthearted and funny take on shitty things when you disappear. When it comes to relationships, I’ve have very similar experiences. I’m starting to think this: Men are at their best when they are in a supportive relationship. Even if it means they are the best asshole, best womanizer, best CEO of whatever, best abuser, A good hearted man will thrive with a supportive woman. A woman works the other way. She starts to give herself away, give herself away, stop thinking as an individual altogether, give up on so much of what she loved (excluding the man). The relationships will be her ultimate goal. That’s when two people stay together. The woman compromises the hell out of herself. I have seen it in my best friends, and it pisses me off, but its a choice I suppose, I feel like I am hoping for a rare gem of a man, who knows the balance between making me feel safe and secure in a relationship whilst letting me be happy to change my own tyres, paint my own house, earn my own money, and just carry on being independent old sarcastic me. Who knows if this kind of diamond even exists.

Man did this stick with me!  I get it.  And in some way, I agree with it – but not 100%.  I have male friends who have also found themselves giving up who they are in a relationship.  No one should have to do that.

Look, we all know that I am in no way a relationship expert – which would partially explain why I’m still single.  BUT I think we can all agree that in a healthy relationships, both people should be bringing out the best in one another, and no one should feel like their losing who they are.  Not ever.

Now get out there and start being the best you that you can be…while I sit on my couch and eat my ice cream.