Big night tonight. HUGE! First date. Yup. That’s right. My secret boyfriend has a date…with someone who isn’t me.
Yesterday when he stopped by to visit he confessed that he’s dipping his toe back into the black waters of online dating. Sunday’s date didn’t go so well – that’s what happens when you post pictures of yourself from 3 years ago, and you happen to gain 40 pounds. She was a no go. Yet he seemed optimistic that his next date would go better.
Said date happens to be tonight. It’s kind of awkward to tell him that I hope he has an absolute shitty date, but I hope he does. Why? Because I totes want him for myself. I know myself well enough that all night I’ll be picturing him with some foxy young hotty having the time of his life. He’ll be off with this blonde bombshell while I sit on the couch watching reruns of Dateline and eating my feelings in the form of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos.
Ugh, I hate it when my secret boyfriends are dating other people.