Archive | 1:58 pm

Minute to Win It

3 Oct

Lunch time at the Minute Clinic.  Instead of having soup and salad for lunch, I’m going to enjoy Dayquil and cough drops.  Just what I always wanted.  No, I don’t have an STD.  That would require boot knocking first, or at least getting really friendly with a dirty toilet.  Sore throat, my friends. Feels like I’ve been shot gunning acid.  It doesn’t feel great and I don’t recommend it if you can avoid it.  It also doesn’t have anything to do with giving free BJs behind the dumpster at the local Safeway.  I swear, it doesn’t.

I try to avoid going to the doctor’s office at all costs.  Having been raised by two doctors, I feel I’m perfectly equipped to self diagnose and treat.  Unfortunately, most of the conversation we had at the dinner table involved some sort of psychiatric condition.  I can keep up with the best of them when the discussion has something to do with a schizo-affective disorder.  I also have strong opinions on General Practitioners prescribing psychotropic drugs.  That’s bad news.  But when it comes to going to see a doctor to take care of myself, I find any excuse to avoid it.

So here I am with a sore throat, avoiding my own doctor, and visiting a faux physician at a freaking drug store so they can tell me whether/not I have Strep throat.  Normally I’d stay home and suck it up, but Saturday I’m heading out of the country to visit family.  Guessing the last thing they want from me is for me to give them the gift of the plague…