Archive | 11:16 am

An Important Question for All Humanity

14 Jan

People buy stupid shit.  I mean really stupid shit.  Who the hell would ever buy those stupid bumper nuts they have for cars?  Don’t know what I’m talking about?  They’re those stupid things that dangle off the back of a car or truck and look like a nut sack.

Why?  Why on earth do you need something like that?  They’re like $25.  That’s $25 that you’re just throwing away for something so completely stupid.  You might as well key, “I’m stupid white trash” on the back of your car, because that’s the message bumper nuts give.

And why would anyone want a pair of these:

Yes, the pajama jean.  The “jeans” for white trash slobs.  They’re like cheap jeggings.  Even the waistband looks god awful.  I can’t imagine anyone ever walking up to someone wearing pajama jeans and saying, “Hey!  Those look GREAT on you!”  You can tell from the commercial they look cheap as hell.

Why?  I just don’t understand it.  Why would you buy things that make you look so terrible or so stupid?