My Mother Wants Me to Smack Her

17 Aug

Working remotely has it’s perks – like staying in your pajamas all day and not having to shower.  Or watching repeats of Toddlers & Tiaras on mute during a conference call.  Even napping for 30 minutes when you’re supposed to be doing research.  Technically, I was doing research.  I was trying to determine if napping would make me more creative – it did not.

There are also plenty of pitfalls when working from home.  Yesterday I got stuck watching Lucy(fer) and Damien for a few hours.  Do you have any idea how hard it is to take a conference call when someone is demanding juice and the other one wants you to play puppies with her?  It’s god awful.

Today, however, takes the cake.  I was leaving a voicemail for the head of my division.  That’s my boss’s boss’s boss, who is just two steps away from the head dude at Widgets & Co.  As I’m nearing the end of my very professional voicemail message my mom walks in the room and starts yelling, “blah blah blah blah blah blah blah!”  I start shooing her away from my hand, but that only makes her more persistent.  She took two steps closer to me and screams into the phone in a mocking tone, “my name is Catherinette and I like to pretend I’m busy and important!”

I can only imagine what the hell this senior executive will think when she picks up her messages.  God help me.

Perhaps I should send an email to my boss’s boss’s boss and tell her I was visiting my mother in a home for the mentally disturbed.

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13 Responses to “My Mother Wants Me to Smack Her”

  1. WV Pie Girl August 17, 2011 at 9:49 am #

    if you get fired, she is required to support you for one year.

    • Catherinette August 17, 2011 at 10:10 am #

      I’m totally going to make her support me for that.

      FYI: you are still a whore to me. 🙂 -CS

  2. Teri Tighe August 17, 2011 at 10:06 am #

    OH.MY.GOD…..our voicemail system allows you to delete the voicemail, hopefully yours does the same.

    I would have punched her in the head, I would have been so pissed.

    • Catherinette August 17, 2011 at 10:11 am #

      Damn it! I didn’t even think about that. I was too panicked wondering what the hell was going to happen. When I told her who the message was for she said, “maybe she’ll think it’s funny.” -CS

  3. AmericanBridget August 17, 2011 at 10:29 am #

    Holy shit balls…I don’t know what to even tell you about that episode.

    • Catherinette August 17, 2011 at 2:48 pm #

      Total whore, right?? -CS

  4. Chris Hull August 17, 2011 at 11:55 am #

    I have had to delete a voice mail and start over several times. It is a nice function to have, try calling into your work number from the home number and see if you can do it.

    • Catherinette August 17, 2011 at 2:49 pm #

      I confessed to my boss that it happened – just to get her prepared to pack up my belongings. She told me we could do it. Yeah, wish I had thought about that sooner. -CS

  5. dk (@wenchwire) August 17, 2011 at 1:25 pm #

    What you REALLY need to worry about is that we become our parents … bwahahahahaha just sayin. love you.

    • Catherinette August 17, 2011 at 2:50 pm #

      I hate you for saying that! -CS

  6. Pkitass August 17, 2011 at 7:21 pm #

    That’s was f*cked up but funny!
    High five your mom for me.

  7. Amber August 17, 2011 at 9:34 pm #

    So, you didn’t smack her?

  8. ShoeGal August 23, 2011 at 11:40 am #

    WTF is playing puppies…and why would your mother think that her behavior is ok….*face palm*!

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