The internet access we have at Widgets & Co. is on serious lock down. I can’t tell you how often I see that menacing ACCESS DENIED message pop up on my screen. We have zero access to Twitter, email, facebook, or any other site that’s halfway decent. You can blame my employment at Widgets & Co. for the decreased blogging efforts. At Investments r Us I’d have my blog up all day long and felt free to write about all the idiots with whom I worked. Now I’m afraid the IT Police will take me away and throw me into one of the rooms where the tables are bolted to the floor so no one can cause a scene.
On my first day the put the fear of God into me when they explained how strict their email use policy is. You can be fired at anytime for any reason if someone accidentally sends you something inappropriate and you open it. To this day I’ve been very cautious with my work email. There’s no way on earth I’d send a message with the word anal (unless it was followed by ysis) to or from my work email. Hell to the fucking no way!
But you know what I will do? I will go ahead and send such a message to Foxy Luv at Investments r Us. In my defense it was in reply to a message from another friend AND I didn’t realize it was going to Foxy’s message. So, Foxy, when your ass gets fired for reading that message, I’ll be the first to tell you I’m sorry. BUT on the flip side, now’s your chance to take up that career as a pole dancer you always wanted.
Here’s what the message said:
Don’t blame me! I’m not the one that likes the anal fisting on a Saturday night. That’s Foxy’s mom! She’ll do anything for a dollar. Am I right, Foxy?
P.S. Your husband called, he wants you to pick up some more lube for tonight. Looks like Anal Monday is back in play!