Better than a Sharp Stick in the Eye…Sort of

2 Apr

Hey peeps!

It’s the Foxy – just living the dream in Smalltimore.

What does living the dream actually mean? Well, for me it includes taking the kids to the eye doctor. I know, right? But relax, it is not really as glamorous as it sounds.

Now – you can imagine how much two small boys love going to the eye doctor. It’s a treat to go with them, really it is. Luckily, their eye doctor specializes in kids – so he is very understanding and the waiting room is full of toys and stuff to keep the kids entertained. This is important, since because he is one of the few eye doctors in town who treats kids, he has a huge practice. Which means you tend to spend most of the time you are there in the waiting room.

For whatever reason, the Hissy Fit Gods had smiled on me the day of our most recent appointment and my boys were really actually very well behaved. This gave me an opportunity to people watch in the waiting room.

As I was sitting with my boys, watching them play, I could hear horrified shrieks of fear and protest coming from the exam room. Having witnessed the freak out my kids have when they need to have their eyes dilated – I knew at once what was going on.

Sure enough, about 5 minutes later, a sobbing four year old came into the waiting room followed by her six year old brother. Dad had drawn the short straw this day and had escorted the kids to their appointments. He sat down with his four year old daughter and tried to calm her down. She kept yelling that her eyes were blurry and she couldn’t see anything – in short, she was totally loosing her shit.

As I was thinking to myself, “Poor little thing…”, I noticed her big brother standing next to the chairs where dad and little sis were sitting. He was just sort of standing there, waiting her her to calm down. As her sobs started to subside, big brother sat down next to her. Very calmly and in a matter-of-fact tone, he said, “You know, you are going to have to have your eyes dilated again someday. They actually do it every year. So you will have to do it again, you know.”

Little sister started weeping all over again. He had just totally shattered her world. As the weeping and the yelling really got going again, big brother got up from the chair and strolled over to the aquarium to look at the fish. Just like, my work here is done and see those salty tears running down her sweet little face – yeah – I did that.

As a mom – I was horrified at his behavior. I want there to be harmony and love between siblings. And I feel strongly that the older ones should look out for the little ones and try to help them. Kum bay – freaking ya and stuff.

But as some one who thinks taking the piss out of others is an awesome occupation – well, I wanted to buy that little bastard a juice box and shake his hand. That was some top drawer asshole maneuvering – and at such a young age! It was like a hug from Jesus – it really was.

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One Response to “Better than a Sharp Stick in the Eye…Sort of”

  1. Angel April 10, 2012 at 3:28 pm #

    Just discovered your blog & can’t stop reading, LOVE it!
    & this story is fucking hysterical!

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