Archive | 10:59 pm

Just the Tip Tuesday (03/01/11)

1 Mar

Admit you thought I was going to let another Tuesday roll by without posting a JTT.  ADMIT IT!  Guess what?  You’re wrong.  I admit I was totally going to let it pass, and then suddenly…BAM!  Inspiration just appeared in front of me.  Don’t you love when that happens?  Like when you’re roaming through the aisles of the local grocery store trying to figure out what the hell you’re going to make for dinner and then you find yourself in the prepared food section and the sushi starts calling out to you?  Man, I love when that happens.

In this case, it was actually a song that came to me.  Specifically, a song by Jack Johnson:

He’s dreamy and I want him to play my bongos.  The only thing wrong with the video is that Curios George appears and I LOATHE Curious George.  He’s a stupid monkey.  Frankly, after all of his stupid ass “adventures” I don’t know why he never died in one of the books.  Freaking HATE him.  Loathe.  Abhor.  Detest.  NO LIKE!

 

Booty Pop!

1 Mar

Watching TV this evening I saw a commercial for a very strange item.  Sure, most of us thought the Snuggie was lame…although we secretly wanted one.  And we’ve all seen the ads for Pajama Jeans.  What’s the point?  Just wear your sweatpants and give up.  Just because your sweatpants look like jeans, it doesn’t make them jeans.  Then there’s these…

What’s wrong with them?  More like what’s NOT wrong with them:

  1. First of all, these are lame.
  2. Second of all, they’re false advertising.
  3. Third, they are really, really lame.

I’d like to take a minute to focus a little bit on number two.  Let’s just say you have a flat ass, one quite like the one I have.  Not a saggy one, just a non existent one.  You decide to go ahead and shell out the cash for these stupid ass panties, throw on your pajama jeans and head out to the club.  By the grace of God, some dude notices how “hot” your ass looks and asks you to dance.  Three drinks and a roofie later, you’re on your way to making sweet love with him in the back seat of his Mustang.

What the hell is going to happen when he slides his hand down the back of your cheap ass jeans and finds that you’re ass isn’t really an ass, but rather a bunch of foam tucked into the back of granny panties?  Isn’t that false advertising?  I mean, how is this any different than stuffing your bra with tissues, or shoving a sock down your pants?

I’m going to go ahead and vote a big fat NO on these bad boys.

Let’s go ahead and file this one under LAME.