Boner is Missing!

22 Feb

Have you heard the news?  It’s a potential tragedy: grown up child actor, Andrew Koenig, is missing.  Don’t recognize his name?  That’s OK, neither did I.  This poor bastard is also known as Boner, from Growing Pains.  Oh yeah, now you know exactly who I’m talking about.

No wonder he’s missing.  Can you imagine being known your whole adult life as a euphemism for an erection?  I can imagine all the trouble he must have gone through.  Wedding vows, “Do you, Boner, take this woman…”

If only he had left an autobiography.  Perhaps something with a clever name like:

  • I, Boner
  • Boner Stories
  • Boner: My Story of Perseverance

WAIT!  Maybe his relatives will write his biography.  It can be called, “My Boner.”

YEAH!

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13 Responses to “Boner is Missing!”

  1. David February 22, 2010 at 3:52 pm #

    I think the tile of his autobiography should have been:
    — Boner, Standing Tall

  2. Skylers Dad February 22, 2010 at 4:16 pm #

    His autobiography was already out, and it was Boner: Rising to the occasion.

  3. jon February 22, 2010 at 5:15 pm #

    I’m concerned. We should not be making any more bad jokes until someone gets in touch with Boner!!!

  4. jon February 22, 2010 at 5:30 pm #

    Police have enlisted the help of fellow child star Jerry Mathers (the Beav) to help coax Boner out of hiding….stop it!!!

  5. cinnamon & honey February 22, 2010 at 6:33 pm #

    Did you see his pic on TMZ? He’s kinda hot in that 90s grunge kinda way. (A hot boner… LOL!)

  6. Del-V February 22, 2010 at 6:45 pm #

    First of all, his dad was in Star Trek. Second, there are drugs that can help men find Boner, consult your doctor.

  7. Amadeo February 22, 2010 at 8:53 pm #

    Did not know Chekov was his father.

  8. BeckEye February 22, 2010 at 10:14 pm #

    Yeah, it’s kind of weird. And sad. But I can’t help but laugh imagining his Dad saying something like, “My Boner is missing!” That’s terrible.

  9. OG February 23, 2010 at 12:14 am #

    Poor boner…I wonder if he’s done more or less with his life than cockroach from the cosby show.

  10. Chef Green February 23, 2010 at 2:39 am #

    You are so evil, hooker! Love it!

  11. Foxy Luv February 23, 2010 at 11:26 am #

    Here’s the part of the story that freaked me out! Boner’s dad is Pavel Checkov from the original Star Trek! If your dad is Checkov – how can you possible have any problems at all? That’s bad ass!

  12. Amber February 23, 2010 at 7:03 pm #

    He gave all his stuff away and told them he “wouldn’t be working anymore”. You know what that means…

    Anyway, that’s strange, because was he still working, anyway?

    All kidding aside, Boner…come home!

  13. evenrant February 25, 2010 at 3:34 pm #

    Well, it is cold and foggy in Vancouver – maybe Boner is not lost – maybe he is just suffering from shrinkage.

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