The World’s Worst Baker

30 Nov

The holidays are about putting on as much weight as possible and blaming it all on the sugary delights that are available this time of year.  I have a weakness for anything that is candy cane flavored.  Last week I managed to eat a half a box of Trader Joe’s Candy Cane Joe-Joe’s in a span of about 37 seconds.  Those were the happiest 37 seconds of my life, even beating out the backseat adventures with Pistols at Dawn.

You can imagine my delight when I went down to the cafeteria this afternoon and saw a homemade “Chocolate Candy Cane Cookie”.  Picture this, 2 big chocolate cookies with a ton of candy cane frosting in-between.

Here’s the problem, there’s nothing in this cookie that tastes like candy canes or chocolate.  Instead, it just tastes like brown butter cookies with butter frosting that has flecks of candy cane all over it. 

Damn you, baker in the cafeteria.  You have fooled me!  You’re like all of those guys that I date that look good on the outside but then turn out to be something entirely different on the inside.  I just want a candy cane flavored dude and end up having to talk about my feelings with someone that’s emotionally retarded.

FAIL!

Advertisements

9 Responses to “The World’s Worst Baker”

  1. Del-V November 30, 2009 at 3:15 pm #

    I’m hooked on normal Joe-Joe’s. I’ll need to try the candy cane cookies now. Thanks and see you at the gym.

  2. Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts November 30, 2009 at 3:40 pm #

    “Damn you, baker in the cafeteria. You have fooled me! You’re like all of those guys that I date that look good on the outside but then turn out to be something entirely different on the inside. I just want a candy cane flavored dude and end up having to talk about my feelings with someone that’s emotionally retarded.” OK, this cracked me the hell up!! lol

  3. Alixandra Hice November 30, 2009 at 5:38 pm #

    Oh, I HATE fake cookie boys. Yeccch.

  4. BeckEye November 30, 2009 at 6:33 pm #

    I’ve never heard of a Joe-Joe. Aside from the one in that Beatles song.

  5. jon December 1, 2009 at 12:46 pm #

    My holiday spirit is nearly entirely devasted after just reading this story. Perhaps I need to make an appointment to see a bartender.

  6. Evenrant December 1, 2009 at 5:10 pm #

    Oh Catherinette, when will you learn? It is cafeteria food for Christ sake! Seriously has anyone every eaten a really good meal at a cafeteria?

  7. foxy luv December 1, 2009 at 10:51 pm #

    They are rat bastards at the cafeteria! In this season of joy and peace, for them to pull this sub-par cookie bullshit is unacceptable! They suck reindeer nut sacks. Fo reals!

  8. Wynn December 2, 2009 at 8:30 am #

    Disappointing bakery goods -really- disappoint. You should tell them! Anonymously. So they don’t start spicing up your coffee with things that shouldn’t be there.e

  9. Wynn December 2, 2009 at 8:30 am #

    And that .e shouldn’t be there either. Just saying..

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: