No Thanks, I Don’t Smoke

28 May

Wine Festival started in Maryland a few weeks ago.  Throughout the Spring and much of the Summer, there are a variety of festivals sponsored by local vineyards.  They’re the perfect excuse to head out to some lovely outdoor location, support the local economy by purchasing wine, and then proceed to get blitzed off your face.

Jewcy Bits and I went to a festival a few weeks ago, we’ll be going to another one this Sunday.  It just so happens that she’ll be meeting Disney there.  It should be magical times, especially when Disney asks, “How did you meet?”  Man do I love making up stories for that.  Like:

  • We had the same John;
  • At the free clinic;
  • The last stall at the Bus Station; or (my favorite)
  • Your mom’s house.

(Actually, that last one won’t work because Disney’s mom is dead.)

Anyway, every year Amber and her husband host a brunch before one of the festivals.  This year is no exception.  The evite went out yesterday and I promptly accepted.  This afternoon I decided to check out who else was planning on attending their brunch.  Just below my name was the following comment, “Wouldn’t miss it for the world!”  Left by none other than Smoke Stack.

Freaking Smoke Stack, the world’s worst kisser.  Smoke Stack whom I thought I would never have to see again.  Damn it.  You know, it’s not like I spend my time dating people all over the place.  Sometimes I hate living in a small town.Why on earth do I have to bump into people I’ve dated?  Why??

Oh, well.  I will clearly have to do the only right thing for a mature woman, such as myself, to do. Bring on the booze.

7 Responses to “No Thanks, I Don’t Smoke”

  1. KV May 28, 2009 at 3:03 pm #

    Can I go ahead and predict a rematch with Smoke Stack’s slobber factory?

    I just threw up in my mouth a little. -CS

  2. evenrant May 28, 2009 at 4:10 pm #

    I love wine – for that matter I love all alcohol – in fact, I drink more than I eat, anyway –maybe smokestack never kissed a girl – maybe he is A-sexual?

  3. jon May 28, 2009 at 4:39 pm #

    You know reality is not doing you any favors when you look forward to getting lucky, by not getting kisssed.

  4. The Ambiguous Blob May 28, 2009 at 6:05 pm #

    If I spent any time at all worrying about running into folks I’d made out with once upon a time, I wouldn’t go out anywhere. But then, I’m kind of a slut. So… whatever- it’s not like you broke his poor bad kisser little heart.

  5. Dani May 28, 2009 at 8:02 pm #

    Dont bring too much booze. Too much might equal another go round and didnt you actually get ill last time?

  6. Jewcy Bits May 29, 2009 at 5:11 am #

    Did you want to start coming up with some interesting “ways we met” right now or do you wanna just see what we come up with while under the influence of alcohol?

  7. Srg May 29, 2009 at 6:05 am #

    He may be a bad kisser but maybe his peen makes up for it in other ways? LOL

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