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Protected: The Nip Slip

31 Mar

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You Owe it to the General Public

31 Mar

You know those people that hang out at the beach that make you wonder, “what on God’s green earth made her believe that she looked good in THAT bathing suit?” The one that has a tad too much cottage cheese and saddle bags big enough to serve as a weekend travel bag?

Bathing suit season is upon us, and there’s nothing that makes me want to slit my wrists like trying to squeeze my fat butt into a bathing suit I have no business being in.

I don’t want to hear the fat on my legs slap together when I run up the stairs.

I don’t want to be the funny chubby friend.

I don’t want to be the one that guys see and make them think, “she’d be pretty if she would just lose a few pounds.”

I’m not going to be that person this year.  And I don’t want you to be either. 

It’s time to banish back fat!! You know you could use that extra kick in the ass, so join me in Operation Muffin Top(ple)!

Just the Tip Tuesday (03/31/09)

31 Mar

The other night when I was at my sister’s house, I somehow managed to talk my sister and brother-in-law into watching “Step Up 2: The Streets” and “Step Up” (in that order). That’s equivalent to wasting 4 hours of our lives that we’ll never get back. Not ever. We were highly amused by the concept of dance crews that would “attack” on the metros. Oh yeah, you read that right. This dance crew would basically get on a metro stop, everyone would sit apart, and then they would just start dancing around-it scared the other passengers, at it should. This crazy terrorist dance crew went by the name of The 410, named after our local area code. We decided that the only answer to having a dance crew called The was to form our own crew called the “443” (our other area code).

Oh how I heart cheesy dance movies. A week later we found ourselves mocking the “actors” in “Centre Stage”. It’s all about a group of kids that end up at the American Ballet Academy. Dear movie makers, let me give you a tip, if you’re going to cast a gay actor as a straight lead, go to town. Let’s just try to have him be a little straighter than the guy that stars in “Centre Stage”. Case in point, Rupert Everett. Hot as sin, and could easily been James Bond over stupid ass Daniel Craig.

Anyway, this isn’t about any of those guys. It’s about someone far hotter: Channing Tatum.

channing-tatum

As it turns out, a friend of mine from work grew up with him and remembers him when he was just a “punk kid”. Apparently he’s a really nice guy and doesn’t talk like a jack hole from the streets of Baltimore like he does in the “Step Up” movies. Here’s a little something you may or may not know about Channing, he’ll be in the new “GI Joe” movie AND he has his own action figure.

If only it was anatomically correct…