What’s A Girl To Do

3 Feb

There seems to be something in the water.  This is the third time that I’ve gotten a nasty comment.  Each time it was over the same exact NFW

The one I read this morning infuriated me.  Take a look:

You are a cold bitch. This guy had cancer, fought through and has a career. As a cancer survivor, he’s a hero to me. Maybe when someone you love gets a serious disease, you’ll find some compassion. Or maybe you wont. Maybe you’ll remain a coward who makes bitchy comments hidden behind a computer and you’ll reach the dizzying heights of unknown computer blogger. Kudos to you, indeed.

Guess what?  Every single one of us has been impacted by Cancer.  Every.  Single.  One.  You’d have to be living in a cave with no contact to humanity to have escaped that.  We all know survivors and we all have lost at leaste one loved one to it. 

So why is “Annoyed By You” so pissed over a stupid ass posting over some guy that I’d never want to sleep with?  If you don’t like it then don’t read the blog.   No one is making you come here to read something that offends you.  Do us all a favor and go read something else and don’t waste your precious time reading something that makes you so damned angry. 

Here’s the thing:  I have no idea how to respond to that.

My first thought (after taking a look at the IP address and finding out what city/state the person lives in, thanks WordPress!) was to just delete the thing and forget about it.

Then I thought, “Wow.  Did I make fun of someone for having Cancer?”  I went back and read the whole entire thing and no, I did no such thing. 

Then I considered writing all about how my grandfather had died of Cancer.  And my grandmother.  And my other grandfather.  Or perhaps I would share the story of my 34 year old friend that left 2 small children behind when she died from Cancer.  No?  Maybe I’d write about my friend that survived testicular Cancer.

Here’s my question: what do you think I should do?


26 Responses to “What’s A Girl To Do”

  1. SouthernBelle February 3, 2009 at 8:54 am #

    I know it’s hard, and I can’t say I’d be able to do it, but my advice would be to just ignore them.

    Judging from the comment, this person doesn’t have a grasp on the *concept* of humor, let alone a sense of humor, and is not intelligent enough to be reasoned with.

    As tempting as it is, I say don’t waste your valuable writing skills on verbally lacerating them – just continue producing what the rest of us enjoy so much!!!

  2. Philly February 3, 2009 at 9:12 am #

    First off, just writing a post about it is entertaining enough. I love when people leave a negative comment, gives me something to blog about.
    And your are right…….EVERYONE is affected by cancer, EVERYONE. My bro died at 42 and my mother died of bone cancer 2 yrs ago.

    “Annoyed by You” is prob ugly.

  3. Foxy Luv February 3, 2009 at 9:23 am #

    I would tell Annoyed by You to put his pom-poms down and move on.

    You were not saying anything about cancer. You were just saying that he was not some one whose peen you wanted near your Vagina Davis.

    And even if you tried to tell Annoyed about all ways your life had been effected by cancer, and how you are senstivie to those fighting cancer, he will try to have a “who has been more effected” off with you. Which will just annoy all of us.

    Yeah – just ignore that guy!

  4. Diane Mandy February 3, 2009 at 9:41 am #

    Ignore it! Either he/she misunderstood your post , was having a bad day, and will think differently after reading this. Or he/she is humorless and miserable. Either way, it’s not your problem.

  5. evenrant February 3, 2009 at 9:48 am #

    Some folks just can’t see the forest because of the trees. I say ignore the ignorant.

  6. Mike February 3, 2009 at 10:10 am #

    Just ignore them. They feed on the attention.

  7. Red February 3, 2009 at 10:26 am #

    I’m with everyone on “don’t respond.”

    And while perhaps this person’s grief is fresh or he hit you on a bad day or something, does he not get that not wanting to sleep with someone doesn’t mean that you have no respect for what they may have been through? I, too, know a guy who survived testicular cancer and I’m glad he did. And he’s cute. But I wasn’t gonna sleep with him before he survived cancer and I’m not going to now, either. We just don’t have that kind of relationship.

  8. Nicole February 3, 2009 at 10:27 am #

    Geez. It’s not like you said you wouldn’t sleep with him because he had cancer. He is just not doable. 🙂

  9. Bella@That damn expat February 3, 2009 at 10:55 am #

    You must be doing something right if you are getting “hate mail”.
    Whatever. There’s an illiterate douche out there reading your blog.

    If I say I would never ever fuck Michael Jackson does that mean I hate blacks? Or whites? Or whatever the hell he is.

  10. pistols at dawn February 3, 2009 at 11:30 am #

    From what I understand, cancer is an STD (which is surprising, because I don’t have it yet, and I’ve got pretty much everything else), so you were totally being a jerk.

    Also, if Richard Kiel is inspirational to you, you really suck at picking heroes. Cancer survivor or not, he’s still just a bit actor in a handful of okay-if-they’re-on-tv-on-Saturday-afternoon movies.

  11. jendy February 3, 2009 at 11:48 am #

    What a douche shuttle.

  12. jon February 3, 2009 at 12:12 pm #

    CS, you can’t always be right, funny and adorable…sometimes a girl has to just pick.
    Your post had nothing to do with making light of cancer….or any issues ABY might be going thru him/herself.

    “Annoyed By You” If this is about the $60 you left on Catherinette’s dresser Saturday nite…it’s time for YOU to let it go!

  13. againseminoma February 3, 2009 at 12:18 pm #

    I don’t think you setout to select & make fun of a cancer patient in “NFW”. It’s not like you had any bad intent against those with cancer. I’ve relapsed on testicular cancer, and I didn’t know DJ Qualls was a cancer survivor.

    IMO, say you never setout to specifically select a cancer survivor to flame, you never knew DJ had that, and be done with it. No hard feelings here.

  14. Amadeo February 3, 2009 at 12:32 pm #

    When will people learn to stop taking the interweb so seriously?

  15. LarryLily February 3, 2009 at 12:48 pm #

    I had cancer, my wife had cancer. Big deal. Some get heart attacks, some have cancer. Live long enough you will get at LEAST one. That said, I am as surly now as ever, cancer or not.

    I see some people get all into their cancer like the Susan G. Komen stuff (walk/ride/whatever). Hey, if that floats your boat, row away. Walking/talking/sharing will not cure cancer. Dying young will keep most of us cancer free, but thats really not an option, is it? So you do with what you are dealt with. But having cancer or not having it should not change your basic tude. If you are snarky, nice, mean or funny, an illness doesnt make you a better or worse person.

  16. Jormengrund February 3, 2009 at 12:51 pm #

    I’d have to get a bit personal here, and say that regardless of who I offend, I’d stick by my comments.

    I mean, they’re trying to judge you on who you are, and what you believe in.

    To that, I’d have to say that whomever it is can SUCK IT.

    You’re quite funny, and have a very distinct style. Don’t let someone else make you feel bad for expressing your opinion.

  17. Jormengrund February 3, 2009 at 12:51 pm #


    Now that I’ve complimented you, when can we meet so I can get into your pants? *wink*

  18. Catherinette February 3, 2009 at 1:04 pm #

    Who has the best readers ever?? I do! I do! -CS

    Except for “Annoyed by You” and “touch me”.

    You two can stick it in your cocoa bumpers.

    Suck on that.

  19. Amber D. February 3, 2009 at 1:41 pm #

    I think there are blog trollers who just go around trying to be assholes on different sites to get attention. Obviously, I’m gonna agree with everyone and say to ignore it, or even delete it. But that might be showing them you care…

    I have already told them to go ahead and suck it. -CS

  20. Del-V February 3, 2009 at 2:00 pm #

    I like when people try to be jerks to me in my comment section. It makes me feel like people are actually reading my blog and not just looking at the photos I post of girls with big boobs.

    Wait. You have a blog? -CS

  21. MsDarkstar February 3, 2009 at 2:13 pm #

    Your blog should be a place where you can say whatever you want to say. Nobody has to agree with what you say 100% of the time and, as you said, if someone doesn’t like what they read, you aren’t forcing them to read it.

    I’ve never understood the whole “I didn’t like what this blogger said so I will leave them a nasty comment” mentality. If I don’t like what someone has to say on a particular day I just read it, go on to the next blog and come back the next day when there will likely be something posted that I *DO* like.

    Why can’t everyone be as reasonable as you are? Why?

    You know, I try to do the same thing. If I’m not interesting in the posting, I stop reading it. How hard is that to do? -CS

  22. The Ambiguous Blob February 3, 2009 at 6:38 pm #

    I used to get hate comments on my blog prior to my little break. For some reason, people thought they could criticize me on MY BLOG! Are you kidding me? No fucking way can you criticize me and let your voice be heard when I have a delete button.

    I always feel bad deleting comments. Part of me wants to keep them up so everyone can see what giant a holes they are. -CS

  23. stephanie February 4, 2009 at 3:29 am #

    I think in situations like these..we need to remember the Cathrinette ’09 resolution. Peen & Wine in OHH Nine. Come on, FOCUS people!!!! 🙂

    I feel like it’s turning into peen and whine in ’09. -CS

  24. Cosmo February 4, 2009 at 11:05 am #

    Don’t pay any attention to what they write about you. Just measure it in inches. – Andy Warhol

    You can’t please everyone!

    My suggestion, take if for the compliment it is. You impacted someone enough for them to take the time to write you an emotional email.

    Your true fans understand that No FU**ing friday is light hearted and totally untrue. We all know you would jump at the chance to DO DJ Qualls. 🙂

    Seriously, don’t let it get to you!

    How did you know? I have posters of him all over my room. And Mickey Rourke too. -CS

  25. Anonymous February 5, 2009 at 9:51 pm #

    Although I agree that you didn’t make fun of a cancer patient on purpose, I also don’t like the NFW feature, in general. I know this will not be a popular comment, but I don’t think it is nice or funny to pick out people and make fun of them. That is just me. I like all of the posts and the JTT feature, but not the NFW feature. I have never commented on it, because, like your other posters have indicated, it is your site and you can do with it whatever you please. I just try to skip over that post on Fridays.

    Thanks for the blog. Just one little opinion.

    Fair enough. See, you shared your opinion without getting all belligerent. I appreciate that. -CS

  26. Richard Rod Johnson February 13, 2009 at 7:14 am #

    Joke ’em if they can’t take a fuck.

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