Archive | November, 2008

David Caruso: Douche Bag Extraordinaire

28 Nov

David Caruso is quite possibly the biggest douche bag in the world, and I know douche bags. I never understood all of the hype surrounding him.  I remember when NYPD Blue premiered a hundred years ago.  I was barely out of womb (or in my early teens), and clearly recall that his ugly mug graced the covers of tons of magazine.  Even at that tender young age, I was mystified by his popularity.  He’s a red headed freak, he can’t act to save his life, and he’s not attractive.  How does a guy like him make it in Hollywood?  One of life’s little mysteries.

He decided to leave NYPD Blue to pursue a film career.  Bad move on his part.  That decision was akin to eating fast food everyday because you plan on losing weight.  His film career didn’t go as planned, which was a blessing to those of us that didn’t care for him in the first place.

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Protected: The International Language of Flirting

27 Nov

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Protected: Happy Skanksgiving!

27 Nov

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Protected: My Mother Rides the Short Bus: Part 2

26 Nov

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Just the Tip Tuesday (11/25/08)

25 Nov

There’s only one thing that I wanted for my birthday on Sunday?  One little thing, that’s all I asked for.  And did I get it?  No, of course not. 

Perhaps, for Christmas, Santa will see fit to stuff this in my stocking:

Patrick Wilson

Oh, Patrick Wilson, please say that you’ll be there to give me some dirty debauched Christmas cheer this holiday season.  Oh, or that maybe you’ll be there to help me bring in the New Year with a bang.

I’ll admit, in the world of wicked hot celebrities, there’s something kind of vanilla plain about Patrick Wilson.  But you know what?  Sometimes I just want something simple.  Plus he has a hot ass.  An ass that you can see plenty of times in Little Children.  Or if you prefer, you can listen to him sing in the movie version of Phantom of the Opera.  But one of his best performances (aside the starring role in my fantasies) was in Angels in America.  Brilliant.  And hot.

They Taste So Good in My Mouth

23 Nov

Hey!  Guess what??  It’s my birthday!!  And you know what?  I’m giving you a gift.  That’s how much I care about you.

A very happy birthday to me!  Now go out there and celebrate for me.

Protected: Gifts from Abroad

22 Nov

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