A Little Known Fact About Me

19 Mar

This is a going to come as a major shock to many of you.  I recommend that you sit down and take a deep breath before continuing.  Ready?  You sure?  Okay, here we go.  I am part pig.  I know!  Shocker!!  Take a deep breath, relax, get a hold of yourself. 

Here comes another huge shocker: I did, indeed, eat the entire pint of ice cream.  Oh how my stomach hurts now.  Hurts so good.  Here’s what doesn’t hurt so good, the knowledge that I inhaled 1320 calories.  

Let’s take a look at the damage, shall we?

  • Calories: 1320
  • Fat Grams: 80 grams (that’s 120% of the recommended daily intake)
  • Saturated Fat: 44 grams (that’s 200% of the recommended daily intake)

Oh how those numbers make we want to weep, but only a little bit.  Because it was all worth it.  All of those fudgey peanut butter filled pretzels have brought a lot of joy to my life. 

Thank you Ben & Jerry’s.  Thank you.

Ugh, my stomach is starting to hurt now. . .

15 Responses to “A Little Known Fact About Me”

  1. edger March 19, 2008 at 7:21 am #

    it’s not your fault. a pint is a single serving size. if it makes you feel any better, my standard friday night for a while consisted of a small digiorno pepperoni pizza and THEN the pint of ben & jerry’s. usually followed by lying on my stomach to make myself feel better. i know, really exciting life, and wierd for wanting to lie on my stomach.

    Just a small one? Why not go for a bigger size? Those little pizzas are fabulous! And I bet they make a good base when you’re planning on adding some Ben & Jerry’s. -CS

  2. Diane Mandy March 19, 2008 at 3:16 pm #

    I think when you enjoy eating something so much, your body releases endorphins and burns more calories. You can enjoy without a hint of guilt!

    If I really REALLY enjoyed it, will the endorphins burn off all of the calories? -CS

  3. teri March 19, 2008 at 5:09 pm #

    I’ve done that before, no big deal. There is guilt attached to those pints, though. That’s how they getcha, the guilt!

    Almost made me want to get another pint. That, however, would have required getting out of bed. -CS

  4. Mr. Fabulous March 19, 2008 at 5:19 pm #

    You know what would be cool? A video post of you scarfing it down!

    Have you ever watched a pig eat out of a troth? Same thing. Just add Simone and you can imagine it. Smoking hot I tell you. -CS

  5. pistols at dawn March 19, 2008 at 7:00 pm #

    If you just eat a half gallon once, a pint won’t ever seem so bad in retrospect.

    How about if I eat the whole entire gallon? -CS

  6. Jenny March 19, 2008 at 7:10 pm #

    Really, you’ve actually eaten quite healthy. Women need more calcium to prevent osteoporosis. They’re also learning that calcium is good for pms.

    Peanut butter has protein. Nuts are also good for your skin.

    Chocolate is well known to have antioxidant properties.

    Pretzels have salt – we all need salt to prevent goiter.

    Remind me to call you the next time that I decide to binge on another pint of ice cream. It sounds like a far better idea after reading your nutritional take on the whole thing. -CS

  7. Amadeo March 19, 2008 at 7:14 pm #

    I’m going with Mr. Fabulous….If you were sloppy it might even be sexy.

    You mean like if the ice cream was trickling down my cleavage? -CS

  8. Guv'ner March 19, 2008 at 7:43 pm #

    God bless you, fatty….uh….I mean honey. It’s good for the soul at 3 MILLION calories. Plus we all know that ice cream goes straight to the boobies. So it’s ok.

    It’s not THAT many calories, let’s not get all crazy. Oh goody! My boobies are going to be even bigger! Maybe that will help me turn things around in boobie wars. -CS

  9. Skylers Dad March 19, 2008 at 8:38 pm #

    I do the same thing, but it usually is with beer!

    I can do more damage with beer than with ice cream. -CS

  10. tabbie March 19, 2008 at 9:30 pm #

    Quick fact: Tabbie has never eaten a bite of Ben & Jerry’s ice cream, though she once presented a business examination on the company in college.

    I demand to know why you are avoiding the deliciousness of Ben & Jerry’s. -CS

  11. cinnkitty March 19, 2008 at 11:11 pm #

    One of my favorite things about Miss Congeniality… “Gimme a pint Jerry? Are you sure?? Yeah.. I’m gonna get “Chip-faced” ha..ha.ha.ha…. 😉

    Oh how I love that movie! I love the whole thing about “Armag-get-i-ton.” -CS

  12. ginormousboobs March 20, 2008 at 12:49 am #

    I like a girl who attacks life with gusto!

    If by “life” you mean “ice cream” then that is how I roll. -CS

  13. Suze March 20, 2008 at 12:51 am #

    Since I’ve “been there done that” I applaud you. And then boo you for not sharing with me. Damn you and your gloating of the chocolately pretzel goodness!

    I believe you meant chocolatey peanut buttery pretzel goodness. -CS

  14. leonesse March 20, 2008 at 1:59 am #

    So, what you’re saying is this is bad for you? I do not accept that.

    You know that I’m not afraid of things that are bad for me. Hence the yellow(ish) Mustang. -CS

  15. tabbie March 21, 2008 at 4:10 am #

    I avoid things that I am afraid I will like too much that aren’t good for me.
    Ice cream and drummers.

    If only all of us had this willpower of yours. Perhaps this would have been good when presented with the yellow(ish) Mustang. -CS

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