Archive | 5:31 pm

Her Superpower: Grating on My Nerves

16 Oct

Note: I had to change some of the content of this post because I’m getting some really strange searches leading here.  Like disgusting people looking for children doing things to their parents that should never ever happen.  Sickos. 

How on God’s green earth did this stupid child get cast on Heroes??

She should be punished.  She is one of the worst actresses I have ever seen.  Seriously, there are adult film stars that are better actresses.  Everytime she’s on the show I pray that she will be killed.  Sadly, it never happens. 

She stinks.  I hate her.  I vote that we beat whoever hired her, and then force him to be locked in a room with her while she “acts” scared.  He needs to get his head out of his boyhole and end this nonsense!  I hate you, casting person.

Wax It!

16 Oct

Debbie Downer just sauntered over to me to ask me about a very important work related matter: Brazilian waxing.  Okay, so it isn’t work related, but it’s a pretty important topic.  She remembered a conversation that we had several years ago, where I mentioned that I had once tried a Brazilian.  She wanted to hear more details.

You see, Debbie Downer seems to have an over abundance of hair near her no-no.  Not in the front, but in the back.  She’s rather sparse and blond up front, but [or should I say “butt”] not in the back. Why did she feel that she needed to share it?  WHY??  That’s just far too much information for me to handle. 

Apparently, she recently discovered that it’s an exceptionally bad idea to Nair that rather sensitive area.  She found that it was so traumatic, that she had to call a nurse.  That’s bad.  If you read the freaking bottle, it even mentions that it shouldn’t go near your no-no.  She also wanted me to know that she’s not quite comfortable taking a razor to the area.  Thanks for the visual Debbie D.

So it seems that Debbie Downer will have her first encounter with the waxing services at a nearby salon.  She’s very nervous about displaying her naughty bits to the beautician.  I had to assure her that it wasn’t as bad as going to the gyno and that she wouldn’t be on full display of the general public.  She’s still somewhat unsure about going, but I think the Nair was the last, painful straw.

I’m sure you’re all dying to know how it turns out.  I’ll keep you posted.