My New Habit

27 Sep

At some point over the last few weeks, I have developed a new habit.  A very annoying and embarrassing new habit.  I’m going to share it with you in hopes that you mock me so much that I stop immediately if not sooner.  Here goes. . .

Every single time I see a good looking guy I say (out loud so everyone can hear), “What’s UP?!?”  That’s cheesy enough, but it’s even worse because I use this really irritating and sleazy tone.  Plus I can’t seem to control the volume at which I use this charming phrase.  I could be in the middle of a conversation with someone, walking down a supermarket aisle, or sitting in the car by myself-there’s the hot guy, and I just vomit out “what’s UP?”

I’m ready for your mocking.  Let it begin.

23 Responses to “My New Habit”

  1. [Cherry] Ride September 27, 2007 at 3:58 pm #

    Were you also using the phrase “So money” a few years ago too? I bet you were.

    No, I wasn’t, but I’m now tempted to change my reaction to “What’s UP?!? You are SO money.” What do you think? -CS

  2. red September 27, 2007 at 4:06 pm #

    CS, just consider that this is probably the fast track to _not_ ever getting to sleep with any of them.

    Red, I’m fully aware that if one of them overhears me saying it, that he will immediately laugh his ass off and roll his eyes at me. Typically, that’s a very bad sign. -CS

  3. The Diva's Thoughts September 27, 2007 at 4:47 pm #

    Ok that IS embarrassing! I find it hilarious!

    I’m here to entertain you! -CS

  4. Mike September 27, 2007 at 5:05 pm #

    LMAO. Oh you need to film that and put it on Youtube. Also I can’t wait to you blog about the guy who responds to you.

    I’m not going to film it!! How awful! It’s bad enough that I know that I’m doing it, I don’t want other people to see it too (though some might not have a choice). I can only imagine who might actually respond to that. -CS

  5. Del-v September 27, 2007 at 5:14 pm #

    How *YOU* doin’?!

    I hope you’re narrowing your eyes a little when you say that. And maybe pointing with your chin when you hit the “you”. -CS

  6. Pistols at Dawn September 27, 2007 at 5:36 pm #

    It can’t inspire anything good, except of course for a sleazy “Me around you, hot stuff.”

    Could you f a guy who said that? Seriously, I’m taking a poll.

    I might be able to-depending on what he looked like. -CS

  7. Heather September 27, 2007 at 6:17 pm #

    HA! I think it’s hilarious…keep doing it just for pure shits and giggles!

    But it’s so embarrassing!! -CS

  8. Malnurtured Snay September 27, 2007 at 6:38 pm #

    Have you considered stapling your lips together? 🙂

    I have, however, I fear that I’ll just end up running over to them and smacking their asses instead of saying something. That would be far worse. -CS

  9. abroad September 27, 2007 at 7:18 pm #

    Many years ago when I was single I went through a post break-up overly confident any man would be lucky to have me phase where I went around slapping post-it notes with my phone number on them onto the chests of men I found attractive. No one called me. No one. It was a short phase.

    Your “What’s Up” is a phase you will grow out of soon enough.

    Guess what, sister? I’ve now placed a big packet of pink post-it notes in my purse. It may have not worked for you, I feel if I harness the power of my “what’s UP” with your post-it notes that it has to work. IT HAS TO! It’s gold, I tell you! GOLD!!

    Oh my god! I’m so excited that I might actually hurt myself! -CS

  10. Pistols at Dawn September 27, 2007 at 7:44 pm #

    If you want that to work, I suggest you add, “I put out” to the post-it note. I’d call that number.

    Also, “I do things most girls don’t.” You could be referring to the Post-It trick, but our mind will do the rest and be the best PR campaign you could have.

    How about if I just write in “Free BJ’s” and then my phone number? -CS

  11. *Red September 27, 2007 at 7:59 pm #

    Hahahaha. That’s funny. I actually laughed out loud when I read that.

    PS. Who is the red that shares my name?

    Red and Red, you 2 should get together. I’d like to be invited to the wedding/civil union. -CS

  12. Amadeo September 27, 2007 at 8:15 pm #

    I say slap their ass and do the Rock and Roll yell. “Owwww!!!”. Or you could trying saying, “Hells yeah”.

    Love the idea of the “hells yeah”. That’s so hot! -CS

  13. tabbie September 27, 2007 at 10:32 pm #

    That’s just sad. Like short bus sad.

    Short bus sad? I haven’t heard of that, is that like a sad version of short bus special? -CS

  14. abroad September 27, 2007 at 10:42 pm #

    At the time I thought it was obvious that I put out, but in hindsight, men can be rather thick. Oh well, too late for me now as I’m quite happily married. I’m anxious to see how it works out for you thought.

    I’ll keep you posted! -CS

  15. Del-v September 27, 2007 at 11:54 pm #

    Pistols has a good idea, you need a PR campaign. The “free moustache rides” t-shirt didn’t work for me in college. I only wish I had a professional to advise me against wearing that shirt out to the bars.

    I’m shocked and dismayed that the girls were’t lining up for the free rides. Shocked. Dismayed. -CS

  16. cinnkitty September 28, 2007 at 2:52 am #

    Damn…I was at least hoping for a “Hey Baby..” before you hit me with the”What’s UP?”….

    …sigh… whatever happened to foreplay?
    Now, it’s just straight to the hard core stuff….. ha..ha..ha..! 😉

    Cinnkitty

    How can you say that “what’s UP” is not foreplay. It’s not like I’m jumping on their laps asking them to do me. -CS

  17. betty boob hug September 28, 2007 at 7:53 am #

    It’s only bad and sad if you say it while wearing a bandana and show your tongue piercing. I actually can’t look at good looking men lately, they remind me of what I should be having but a loose vagina and three anoying brats later, have prevented me from enjoying their company.

    I think it’s a good thing you are showing your appreciation of the opposite sex, It’s not like you are out there wolf whistling them from tall buildings and flashing bum cleavage 😉

    I ditched the bandana long ago, like when I was 5. I don’t live on a farm and don’t drive a train, therefore, there’s no need for a bandana.

    I haven’t been flashing the bum cleavage, but maybe I’ll have to do that tonight. -CS

  18. Mister Underhill September 28, 2007 at 3:04 pm #

    I wish every girl did that. it would make it easier to tell when they were ready to be sexualized.

    You think? Would you actually find it hot if some girl approached you and did that? -CS

  19. BottleBlonde September 28, 2007 at 3:30 pm #

    Why not just fart on them?

    Pretty sure that would repel them. Though I’m sure there’s a guy out there that would find it hot and kinky. Who ever he is, I don’t want him. -CS

  20. red September 28, 2007 at 5:39 pm #

    *red, didn’t I see you over at LMNtal attraction? Are you a redhead, too? Mine is also en homage to Katherine Hepburn’s character in _The Philadelphia Story_. However, I’m straight, and I bet you are, too, so CS, zero percent chance (as my bf says) of a civil union.

    Hello? *Red? Where are you? *red is looking for you!! Maybe you two can just be roommates and start a wacky new tv show. -CS

  21. tabbie September 28, 2007 at 11:57 pm #

    short bus sad = you look at a retard and think “how sad”. That’s what I do when I think of you saying “What’s Up” when you see hotties.

    Ouch. I was hoping you’d just say, “how pathetic, and amusing.” -CS

  22. cinnkitty October 2, 2007 at 2:35 am #

    Nope… sorry CS, but hitting them right off the bat with a “what’s UP?” doesn’t count as foreplay.

    You gotta soften them up a bit first with a well placed “Hey hotstuff” or “hey baby” before you go for the patented “what’s UP?” score maker. hee…hee..hee… 😉

    Come on! It’s so hot, though! They have to like it! -CS

  23. Write Procrastinator October 12, 2007 at 4:01 am #

    Heh-heh-heh…

    A recurrence of teenage hormones, eh?

    It’s quite possible. Maybe I should lay off watching The Hills and TRL. -CS

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