Archive | 10:07 pm

Another Prime Example of Un-boyfriend’s Uselessness

30 Aug

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: Un-boyfriend is useless.  Several months ago, I had a minor emotional outburst and posted about Mr. Big X returning to the area from Chicago.  Un-boyfriend and I had been broken up for a few months before I started dating Mr. Big X.  They knew each other, and were civil to one another.

As it turns out, he happens to be working in the same building as Un-boyfriend.  How about that for a coincidence??  When I found out that they would be working in the same building, I was sure that Un-boyfriend would provide me with some scoop about Mr. Big X.  He would regale me with stories about how Mr. Big X had a receding hairline, an extra chin, and a pot belly.  I was looking forward to hearing all about it.

They had their first run in about 2 months ago.  Un-boyfriend saw Mr. Big X from across the gym.  They did not speak to one another, and he could not provide me with a physical description of how Mr. Big X had lost his once hot looks.  Nothing.  Not. One. Damned. Thing.  Since then, I hear that they ride in the elevator together and they pretend not to know one another.

Until today.  Below is the email exchange highlighting the interaction between Un-boyfriend and Mr. Big X:

  • UB: I just talked to your boy for the first time.
  • CS: How’d that go for you?
  • UB: Super. He said, “Hey Un-boyfriend, how are you?” I said, “Good Mr. Big X, how are you doing?” To which he replied, “Good.”

He clearly missed the memo where he’s supposed to get me all the dirt on Mr. Big X so that I can revel in the fact that his life went to shit after he dumped me on New Year’s.  That’s right, on New Year’s.  Nice guy.

Behold. . .

30 Aug

The most disgusting gum in the world. 

It’s as if the makers of Chloraseptic partnered with Dentyne to make a gum.  Promise me that you’ll never put it in your mouth.  Really, it’s for your own good.