Sure I dated someone who had horse teeth. And maybe I made out with a dude who had a girlfriend (but his body was AMAZING and he was 9 years younger). And yes, there was even a dude with a lot of back hair who sweat a lot and was dumber than a box of rocks. But I have standards. They may be low, but I’ve still got them.
No matter how old, or lonely, or desperate I get, I will never ever ever EVER ever EVER ever ever date any of the following:
- Men who own jorts (jean shorts)
- Men who wear hunting gear as a fashion statement
- Anyone who looks like he belongs on “Jersey Shore”
- Dudes with Fu-manchu mustaches
- Dudes with any mustaches (even if it’s Movember)
- Men who look like they squeezed themselves into a size smedium (that’s small/medium) t-shirt when they need an XL
- Dudes who take shirtless pictures of themselves in the bathroom mirror at work (3D doesn’t count. We were already dating when he started doing that)
- Anyone who has a sick obsession with cats, Star Trek, or Valerie Bertinelli
I’d rather be single forever than deal with any of those dudes.
What about men with beards during Movember?
Beards are fine. A lonely mustache is not…
Whew! I thought I was gonna have to shave early.
So a Star Wars obsession is okay? I would take exception to the mustache, but I figure if you have facial hair why not at least go for a full goatee.
Great list, could not agree more. And pictures in front of the mirror are just stupid…especially in the men’s room at work. Unreal.
we miss your posts.
I have returned! -CS