You know that girl that is totally insecure and does stupid things and things stupid thoughts? Well, she’s taken over me. Tomorrow I’m supposed to go out with one of the guys from match.com. It’s already destined to be a bad date as the front lawn is mowed, the house will be clean, and my legs will be shaved. Assuming you’re up to speed on the science of hooking up, you’ll know that I just named 3 of the 7 factors that tip the scales in one’s favor.
So get this: he’s supposed to call me to “confirm” the plans. Yeah, it’s almost 8:00 on the night before our supposed date and I’ve heard nothing. Not one word. My guess: his name will be changed to Mr. Stood My Ass Up.
Oh well, at least the house is clean and the lawn looks decent.
And just as I’m about to publish the post, the phone rings.
Filed under: just the tip
confirming dates is a good idea. It always reminds me that I have a date when the fella calls.
This is a good point. I don’t need to be reminded, though, I totally wouldn’t forget. Pretty much since I rarely go on dates. -CS
Booo…no cliff hanger ending. I think you should record the whole date for our amusement.
If it bombs we’ll develop a cocktail and name it after you…then get drunk and repeatedly laugh at your misfortune…
Start getting ready to name that drink… -CS
Now that sucks. He better call! On the plus side, your house is clean. Although I hate to waste a good house cleaning when no one is around to “ooh and ahh” about it.
He did call. We talked for a whole 10 minutes. -CS
Do you need me to call at a specified time to check in on you…pull that whole “friend having an emergency thing and I have to go now” thing.
That’s a very kind offer. I think he might be the one that needs saving. After all, he’s the one that’s going to be in the presence of someone that hasn’t been laid since July. His chastity and junk could be in jeopardy. -CS
You mowed the lawn for this guy? No really? He’d better be hot.
He’s not going anywhere near my lawn. I don’t know him well enough to actually know where I live. F that noise. I mowed the lawn because my front lawn was starting to look like the Serengeti. There were even wild animals trying to nest in there. -CS
Were there any cat bears in your lawn? Because that would be a really good infestation to have.
I’ll wish you luck, but I’m not going to tell you if it’s good or bad luck. Bad would be far more hilarious to read about, though.
As a matter of fact, there was some evidence that some cat bears were living there. It was the perfect habitat for them.
Bad luck certainly does make for better stories! -CS
Don’t you just hate that.
I do! I do! -CS